Why You Should Leave Pastor Adeboye And His Generation Alone
Every now and then, someone who belongs to the older generation makes a public statement that riles up the younger generation, and expectledly, there is outrage. Rage is a natural, often impulsive response, to things that strike us as…well…outrageous. But rage can be misplaced and unproductive. Here is a short piece on why the younger generation needs to stop being outraged at older citizens for speaking about the only systems they have known all their lives.
You see, it is a system that served its purpose for thousands of years. They met it on ground and it worked well for them, as it did for their own parents and grandparents. Who are you to expect them to drop it and start learning your new ways? Why do you think it is fair to expect men and women in their 70s and above – who have known only that one thing all their lives to reboot and start afresh?
Pastor Adeboye made a statement of how devoted and submissive his wife is, on the premise that she recognizes him as the head of the home. This is because the arrangement of the man being the head of the home worked efficiently for centuries. That’s why even your mothers swear by it and defend it. You need to understand that.
Women were not forced to submit. The situation on ground for centuries made submission expedient. It was a mostly physical world that humanity lived in. The survival of the human race, and any community of humans – family, villages, towns – depended on brute strength. Without the physical strength of men, humans were mostly helpless and defenceless.
Because of their stronger frame, men provided protection from the forces of nature and from wild animals. Homes required brute strength to construct. Lumberjacking, sailing, security, and most other tasks required men to step up. And so, a natural order evolved: men as heroes and protectors and leaders; women as nurturers. It wasn’t forced. Everybody understood the need for that order.
That was how chivalry came about: as humans, we love and adore our heroes – those who step up to save the day. For centuries, that was mostly men. Knights in shining armour.
In recent times, things have changed. A new order has evolved. Humans have sufficiently developed to have cities and towns that are mostly safe from nature and from animals. A lot of tasks have been automated or made easier by hydraulic systems. New jobs that require little or no brute force have sprung up. Women can drive trucks without requiring the muscles of men. Women now get educated.
Hallelujah! It is a completely new order from what used to be. It has been in place for longer in some other areas of the world. But in a lot of places around the world, this new order is only a few years (or at most, decades) old.
Hopefully, you can see why insulting and ranting at people who have known only the old system all their lives does not make sense. Most of our fathers and mothers belong to the old order, a system that was expedient in their time. Cut them all the slack. Not some. All. Leave them alone to enjoy what they know.
Do you really think that Mrs. Adeboye wants to give up the safety and security that she enjoys with her husband for your fancy new ideas and ideals? She does not. She is happy as things are with her husband and will likely advocate it to her own sons and daughters. Thankfully, they are not likely to follow through. As more and more people become educated and interact with others, they see how things have changed and adapt.
Rant all you want; the old guard will not change. What you must do is attend to the task of enlightening members of your generation who do not understand this transition. And instead of being abusive, explain it. See how I have explained it in this article? That wasn’t so hard.
Enlighten people. Show them how this new system is beneficial to our times and how it works better for now and for the future. There is no-one who sees the benefits of a new system and holds on to the old.
Leadership is no longer the exclusive preserve of men, because now women can be heroes and providers too. It is a new world where both men and women stand together side-by-side as partners. In today’s world, some women earn more than their boyfriends and husbands, and that is perfectly okay. It isn’t strange to the new generation.
But you see the older generation? Ranting at them won’t do anything. Actually, you are being unreasonable. They can’t understand why you are so angry at them. The men are comfortable with the arrangement they have, as are their wives.
PS: Someone will ask how I can say that the old order worked efficiently when there was/is so much abuse evident with it. To that, I say that we must learn to separate systems from abuse. There was abuse in the old system because humans are imperfect and some humans are wicked.
Do we not see abuse happening under the new system too? We see it every day. Why? Perhaps we should throw this new order out too? No. Abuse happens because there will always be unreasonable people. Democracy is hailed as the holy grail of governance, yet a lot of abuse happens there too. Have you not seen what is going on in the USA, the world’s champion of democracy?